"Sundays at Tiffany's" by James Patterson

Sundays at Tiffany's begins with Jane, a young girl with a wealthy diva for a mother named Vivienne. Jane appears shy and misunderstood and she seeks refuge in her relationship with her imaginary friend, Michael. It later appears that Michael, a handsome and charming thirty-something, is more invisible than he is imaginary. Michael leaves Jane promising that she will forget him completely. Fast forward about 24 years and Jane is working an unsatisfying job for her mother, is in an unsatisfying relationship, and still has not forgotten Michael.

I read this book because I was in the mood for feel-good romance. I have to admit that the premise for this book is original. I also enjoyed the element of fantasy in the book as it relates to imaginary friends actually existing outside of children's imaginations. We find Michael in between "jobs" (children to befriend and guide). He lives a seemingly normal life in New York City, is completely visible, and possesses a few neat powers.

Then Michael sees grown-up Jane. He is hesitant to approach her because it breaks some sort of "imaginary friend code' or something. They eventually meet and start to develop a relationship. This is where the book begins to spiral out of control. Not that it was in much control to begin with. Yes, the interpretation of imaginary friends is unique, but Patterson's/Charbonnet's prose is the ultimate downfall. Tiffany's is a story of love and destiny. A very poetic type of storytelling is required to convey that emotion; and Patterson just doesn't have it. I think he equates sappy with poetic because this story is not short on sap. Not by a long shot. Patterson also only describes the love between characters by writing variations of "she loved him" or "he loved her so much." This got tired fast. Still, for all that awful sappiness I still felt compelled to finish it. And I got through it very quickly. It doesn't drag (thank God), but it's definitely not worth the effort.

Hamlet 2

Hamlet 2 stars Steve Coogan as an actor-gone-high school drama teacher. His lackluster productions lead the school board to cut funding for the drama program on the eve of his original play intended to save the department: Hamlet 2. This sequel has Hamlet traveling through time with Jesus for some reason and is viewed as highly offensive by many. As a result, the school decides to cancel the play. But Coogan's character is bent on performing his baby.

Quite the premise.

Unfortunately, the film doesn't live up to the premise. The only funny moments in the film are when we see characters rehearse the play or discuss its scenes. This really builds up expectations for the final performance which doesn't end up being funny at all. It is built up to be so scandalous, over-the-top, and crossing the line, but in the end Hamlet 2 (play and film) is just not that outrageous. I was very frustrated because the premise and its star, Coogan, obviously have so much potential. But instead of relying on shock humor (I expected something in the vein of Matt Stone and Trey Parker) it settles for uninspired slapstick and unoriginal urban-meets-suburban student interactions.

Hamlet 2 was a vehicle built to soar, but never manages to lift off the ground.

Death Cab for Grammar

Continuing my previous rant on Death Cab for Cutie (a band I actually casually like)...

Something I have always taken issue with is the lyric "the rhythm of my footsteps crossing floodlands to your door have been silenced forever more" from the terrific song "Transatlanticism." The lyric is beautiful, descriptive, and moving... on opposite day! It should actually read "has been silenced forever more." The subject of the sentence is "rhythm," but it is written as if "footsteps" (the object of the preposition) is the subject. "Of my footsteps crossing floodlands to your door" is the prepositional phrase and should be removed when conjugating the verb. Once it is removed you are left with "the rhythm have been silenced forever more," making it obvious that "has" should be used instead of "have." The rhythm was silenced, not the footsteps themselves.

Now this is not a big deal. I post so many egregious errors on this blog that I often cringe when I go back to read my entries. The difference is, once I realize the error, I fix it. I realize that Death Cab cannot change the studio recording of "Transatlantacism," but I thought that they might revise the lyric when they perform it live. On Sunday July 5 at the Hollywood Bowl, much to my dismay, Ben Gibbard sang the word "have." Oy vey!

The New Pornographers, Tegan and Sara, and Death Cab for Cutie at the Hollywood Bowl 7/5/09

I must say that my first trip to the Hollywood Bowl was a very good one. It was a perfect night to be outside, the scenery was very pretty, and the venue's size did not hinder my enjoyment as much as I expected. My one qualm was with the sound. Though clear, the sound of more "rocking" songs seemed a bit wimpy. But I suppose this is understandable as the venue was intended for orchestral music, not rock and roll.

The New Pornographers took the stage first and played a very tight 30-minute set. Their performance of "Challengers" (the most acoustic song of their set) was very good and displayed gorgeous harmonies, but the chatter of the crowd took a lot away from the moment. It's too bad because that was the one song not hindered by the sound of the Bowl. There are a few songs I wish they would have played, but in 30 minutes they couldn't please everyone. I am pleased with what I got: a well-performed high-energy set of great music. The only issue I took was that singer A.C. Newman seemed to struggle with the harmonies of the last two songs "Sing Me Spanish Techno" and "The Bleeding Hearts Show." I doubt that this was an isolated incident because I couldn't imagine his voice hitting some of the notes on any occasion.

Tegan and Sara were up and running within 15 minutes of the end of the Pornographers set. Their first song, "Dark Come Soon," grabbed the audience's attention right away, but they were unable to keep that very firm grip. They used a good balance of banter and music to keep the audience engaged within their allotted 45 minutes, but suffered from what appeared to be a lack of practice. They played a gig in Seattle two days earlier, but are not currently touring and probably have not had tremendous amounts of rehearsal time with the band. Some of the transitions were a little sloppy and left the songs feeling less than dynamic. "Living Room" was the only song from their first two albums in their "Con"-heavy set and I was left wishing for a bit more diversity. I really enjoyed finally seeing Tegan and Sara live for the first time, but felt like seeing them headline a smaller venue would be much more fitting. "Nineteen" and "The Con" would probably rock more with a louder sound system and people would not be chatting during their quiet numbers. So this was basically a tease for me.

Then Death Cab for Cutie took the stage. I feel like I should begin to describe their set at the end of it: 17,000+ people on their feet, applauding as though they had just seen one of the most riveting performances in recent music history. Because they had... for about 8 minutes. Death Cab opened without the Philharmonic with a rocking "Marching Bands of Manhattan" and made cool transition from a song I'm not familiar with into "The New Year," but that was about all I liked about the first half of the set. The privilege of watching Chris Walla shred wasn't even enough to keep me interested. I admit I'm kind of growing tired of Death Cab, I don't like their new music at all, and I was bitter that such a mediocre band would sell out such a huge venue. So this review is a bit biased. I got my wish and they played "Summer Skin," but they didn't do it with the Philharmonic which continues to puzzle me.

After about 40 minutes, they left the stage promising to return with the Philharmonic. I have to admit that adding all those instruments made their sound much more dynamic. I don't really understand their insistence on rocking with songs like "Movie Script Ending" when more melodic songs (like "Summer Skin") really could have benefitted from the orchestra. After about 30 minutes of slightly improved music the audience was brought to the previously mentioned 8 minutes of euphoria. Yes, I am talking about the "Transatlanticism" finale with the LA Philharmonic in tow that I new was coming. I expected it, but I never could have been ready for it. The performance was great and the Philharmoic added beautiful texture. I was afraid they would make the song too busy, but they were able to evoke the wide-open ocean sound that they do so well on the record. And just when I thought it couldn't get better, the fireworks began. It was such a perfect visual and audial crescendo. Really perfect. I can't think of a performance that made me feel like that. It's amazing how a good finale can make you forgive an hour of mediocrity.